Tag: thoughts

Still alive

I haven’t been writing as much this summer. I’ve had a few things over the summer and most of it was regarding one or another health condition. I have been battling with ADHD this summer. I was medicated when I started this blog and I’ve been off my meds for a bit because I haven’t been able to get an appointment for them. This is basically the state of the UK mental health services, and not just because of the pandemic. It’s been like this for years.

I’ve also been battling with covid and possible long covid or worsening of my conditions. Basically, I have had more brain fog and fatigue since covid. It’s slightly getting better now with time. I definitely do not want to have covid again.

I’m writing this for my sake. I am writing this so I don’t get too anxious about writing my next real post. I have a tendency to get more and more anxious as more time goes past. And this is a note that I will write again when I feel better.

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Writing and Creativity

Ideas for stories are everywhere. You can find them in real life, on TV, in other books, and in your own imagination.

According to the Cambridge dictionary, creativity is the “ability to produce or use original and unusual ideas”. Some of us have more creativity than others. It’s believed that people with ADHD, like me, are more creative than neuronormals. Which I can believe. Creativity creates ideas in your head with a small filter of what should happen, what is realistic or how things connect. We have a little filter between these jumps, which you can notice if you are talking to someone with ADHD, and their, our, conversation jumps from one thing to flower pot, as we say in Finland. This is a big part of creativity, the ability to jump from one idea to another.

These jumps can be measured. I have been told of an exercise where you are asked to write down ‘what can you use a brick for’. So this includes the normal ones, like to make a wall, a fence, a road or an oven. Or it can include stuff like something to step to reach higher, a paperweight. If you give it to a child, it could become a character or vehicle. There is a little filter in our head that thinks, ‘oh, this is stupid, not that’.

For writing, I think it’s important to stop thinking that way. There are no stupid ideas when it comes to creating a new world. This comes naturally to me as someone with ADHD, but I think anyone can create a safe place for themselves where there are no stupid ideas. A spark of an idea can create a world. You can get these sparks anywhere. I got the spark for my series from a tv series. It was a simple what if. What if instead of that happening, what if this happened. That was the start I needed. Then I started to write down a few things, and it keeps growing and growing until it was a full world. Another great starting place is dreams. Write down dreams, and they might spark something to write.

To support creativity, figure out what works for you. I am someone who tends to prognosticate, so I use that as a pro for creativity than a con. I start thinking about whatever is bugging me. It can be a scene, a person. I start to think about them, their relationships with other people or scenes. It usually goes somewhere when I just allow myself to relax and be open to it. It won’t happen if I’m stressed. Some people prefer just to write and write. I’m not the type, but there is nothing wrong with being either type. Knowing what works for you will help you. If you try to do it in a way that doesn’t support who you are, it can make you more frustrated. Self-reflection helps here. Get to know yourself. Ask yourself questions.

I hope this helps to get you to think a bit more about creativity. Most importantly, I will say, try not to worry and stress. Do something relaxing, take a moment for yourself.

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Self-Reflection

I’m not talking about the reflection you see in a mirror or on water. I am talking about being introspective of yourself, self-reflection.

It is a very good habit to have. Reflection isn’t about prognostication or what-if scenarios. It has nothing to do with anxiety thinking either. It is simply just looking at yourself.

Why do I do this in this kind of situation?

Why do I feel this way?

What is going inside my head?

It is a helpful skill for anyone. It allows you to grow as a person. It can help you to react in a way you would like to instead of the way you do. It can help you to understand yourself more. It can help you to find your strengths and weaknesses and how to support them.

I am asked to do a lot of reflection as part of my studies. It is a good skill to have as someone in the field of psychology. If I was a researcher, it would allow me to find how my own views would affect my research. As a psychotherapist, it would let me look at my own reactions to my clients and how I would carry the job. But it’s not just good for psychology. I think it’s an important skill for any person. We are constantly growing and changing. Taking a moment every once in a while to look into yourself isn’t a bad idea. We can take a moment to look at why we have behaviours that we don’t like. We can look into why we do it. But it’s good to balance it with the good as well. What am I good at. How can I grow in a direction I want to grow?

It gets easier with time. I like to use my reflective journal separate from my normal journal. I usually pick a topic that I want to go into. I write down anything that comes into my mind about it first. Sometimes I realise that I think about a particular topic this way because something happened when I was younger. This allows me to take stock of my biases.

It’s also important to note that this is for you only. No one else needs to see it. There is nothing embarrassing or wrong with what you are writing down. All of this just helps you to understand what is going on inside your head. It’s also important to do it in a neutral way. Don’t talk down on yourself, or put yourself down. There is no right or wrong way to do it. You are just getting to know yourself. Make sure you have time for yourself in a calm environment. There is no right or wrong time to do it. It’s fine to do it just before going to bed, just remember to end it on a positive note. If it is making you feel anxious, take a step back and ask yourself why. Questions, like why, what, how, who, are good way to get started too.

I hope this gets you started on your journey to better knowledge about yourself.

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Blocks

I am right now in a writing block. It’s not as much a creative block but just a block that is not letting me write. I just wanted to explore the few different ones that I have got so far.

I have had creative blocks or writer’s blocks. These mean different to different people. For me, they mean that I cannot think creatively about what happens next. I am just stuck. I have identified a few reasons for this. It might not be the same for you. For me it means, I have no way forward. I have noticed this keeps happening when I don’t have an outline. I am a plantser, so I like to write from the seat of my pants and plan a bit. I usually have an overall plot. I have a few points where I need to get, but I don’t know how I get there until I write the story. If I don’t have a point to go to, I tend to get stuck.

Another thing is that I might have a completely different idea of what is about to happen, which doesn’t go with my outline. Until I figured out how to accept and bring two ideas together, I would be stuck. It can sometimes take a bit of time and go from different angles.

Sometimes I just don’t know what to do next, even if I know where I’m supposed to go. Nothing just comes to mind. It feels like my mind is a complete blank.

What do I do to help these situations? With the first one, I would try to write out an outline. Sometimes this does lead to the third problem. If I get any ideas, I will write them down, and eventually, it will become a full novel! Sometimes the ideas are completely random and it feels like they cannot connect, but it does come together. Again, it does connect to problem two.

For the second block, I go visit my world. I admit that I have hyperphantasia and ADHD and I can literally see my world like I was in it. I read what I’ve written, listen to the people, see what is out there. I try to catch an idea from something tiny spark. And sometimes, I just have to start writing and the magic just happens. I think often we are too worried or stressed and that blocks our creativity. We want it to go one way, and it doesn’t want to. We just have to give it time and it will right itself. Just the process.

What do I do when my mind is completely black? I need to figure out why. The first thing I do is take a step back. If I’m too close, I won’t be able to see the problem. The problem might be that one of my characters want to do something else. The worst thing I can do to myself is stress myself out. I cannot give myself too tight deadlines or write every day. It will block my creativity if I have to force it. I will stress myself and my mind goes blank. When that happens, I try to destress myself. The best way is to do something else creative. I love dancing, painting and singing. I just need a creative stress free outlet. So, I do something else. When I am less stressed, I start thinking properly again and I have a good idea.

The best ideas can come from anywhere. I have gotten what if idea off a tv show. What if that happened. I can also do it with my story. What if my main character encounters something weird like a dragon? I would say normally, what-if scenarios are to be avoided when it comes to real life, but as a writer, I find them to be amazing!

Sometimes it’s about a lack of faith in yourself. Some people say don’t this, but sometimes having a friend or family member read your story and most likely they will like it and it will keep the motivation to write going.

I hope this has given you some ideas!

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Who am I?

As you visit this site regularly, you will start to see some themes. There are a few things that are imporant to me, including the environment, adopt don’t shop, psychology, mental health and my writing.

Psychology is important to me. It even comes up when I’m writing my story. I have hidden quite a bit of psychology in my story. It comes in ideas of 54321 method for example. I am a psychology student in university. I can’t help it.

This blog will be in two parts. One of them will be a more personal blog with my thoughts and ideas. The other part is about my writing. It will include what I have struggled with, what was easy and short stories.

A fw things about me that you might find interesting!

  • I have four autoimmune diseases, which include t1 diabetes, hashimoto’s and coeliac
  • I have two cats but I would love to get a dog or two
  • Like I said, I am studying psychology, but this isn’t my first time in uni
  • I have previously studied English philology in university
  • I am not native English speaker. I am a native Finnish speaker!
  • I have always wanted to learn how to play cello

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